97th percentile - Head Circumference
80th percentile - Weight (25 lbs)
30th percentile - Height (30")
Friday, May 14, 2010
Monday, April 5, 2010
Feeling Down...
I've been feeling very "down" lately.
I know I'm not the only one who feels this way from time to time, but this time it seems to be lasting a long time (Its been over 2 weeks now...)
There is a list of reasons why I feel this way, and it is effecting me.
Firstly, I feel like I'm not appreciated. I strive on compliments, its just my personality. So when I do things and they go unnoticed, I shut down. Things that I should do around the house don't get done (laundry, dishes, etc) because I think I'm too tired to do them, and that isn't true, I just don't feel like it, so I don't.
Next, vacations or any time that the hubby takes off ends up being anything but relaxing for me... actually much more stressful. I know he doesn't do it on purpose, but it certainly feels like it!
I am just sick of having to be the one that has to remember everything, take care of everything, I want a vacation! I want to go away from here for a few days to be away from all responsibility.
Another thing, It makes almost frustrated but mostly sad, that Keira doesn't get the attention that her cousins do. I know we live far away, but we might as well live in another state since no one comes and visits us!
Warning: This is my opinion, and not meant to hurt anyone's feelings. But It feels like Keira's cousins are favored. And if it is because they don't see her as often as they see her cousins, I guess we'll just blame me. Because no one else has the ability to drive 30 min to an hour to visit us, it is completely on me/us to visit. To do all the driving around, and arrive with a crabby baby because she won't nap in the car on a drive less then 40 min.
Also, living here is getting harder and harder. It is way to small, I trip over myself in the kitchen daily. I want to be able to watch what I want to on TV and it not be more important to play video games than my lame Food TV! I want to be able to escape the History Channel, I want a yard! Sylar NEEDS a yard, I'm so sick of hearing him get yelled at for doing thing that dogs do... He needs to be able to run around! Not to mention I can't stand the majority of our neighbors - I could deal if I wasn't stuck here ALL THE TIME, but there is no escape for me, and they are annoying. I realize a lot of people don't like their neighbors, but I can deal with it if they weren't in my personal space. These kids play right in front of our door, every moment they are home, and NO ONE watches them!
For awhile, I just dealt with it, held it in, but now I'm getting crabby and snippy, and overly judgmental about everything because I am projecting how I feel onto everyone around me. (Sorry to Mike who takes most of it)
Now I'm starting to get sad. Just writing this I am getting teary... and why? Because I feel like a schmuck! I know of so many people that deal with so much more in their lives, many people have it harder than me, and here I am feeling sorry for myself, and then I feel bad and guilty for feeling this way and I cry. Its a terrible circle.
If its going to be another 2 years before we can move out of here, If I keep going on being unappreciated, If I have to listen to another story about something one of Keira's cousins did, If I have to be stuck inside for longer than a few days - I am going to have a nervous breakdown.
I just want a break!!!
I know I'm not the only one who feels this way from time to time, but this time it seems to be lasting a long time (Its been over 2 weeks now...)
There is a list of reasons why I feel this way, and it is effecting me.
Firstly, I feel like I'm not appreciated. I strive on compliments, its just my personality. So when I do things and they go unnoticed, I shut down. Things that I should do around the house don't get done (laundry, dishes, etc) because I think I'm too tired to do them, and that isn't true, I just don't feel like it, so I don't.
Next, vacations or any time that the hubby takes off ends up being anything but relaxing for me... actually much more stressful. I know he doesn't do it on purpose, but it certainly feels like it!
I am just sick of having to be the one that has to remember everything, take care of everything, I want a vacation! I want to go away from here for a few days to be away from all responsibility.
Another thing, It makes almost frustrated but mostly sad, that Keira doesn't get the attention that her cousins do. I know we live far away, but we might as well live in another state since no one comes and visits us!
Warning: This is my opinion, and not meant to hurt anyone's feelings. But It feels like Keira's cousins are favored. And if it is because they don't see her as often as they see her cousins, I guess we'll just blame me. Because no one else has the ability to drive 30 min to an hour to visit us, it is completely on me/us to visit. To do all the driving around, and arrive with a crabby baby because she won't nap in the car on a drive less then 40 min.
Also, living here is getting harder and harder. It is way to small, I trip over myself in the kitchen daily. I want to be able to watch what I want to on TV and it not be more important to play video games than my lame Food TV! I want to be able to escape the History Channel, I want a yard! Sylar NEEDS a yard, I'm so sick of hearing him get yelled at for doing thing that dogs do... He needs to be able to run around! Not to mention I can't stand the majority of our neighbors - I could deal if I wasn't stuck here ALL THE TIME, but there is no escape for me, and they are annoying. I realize a lot of people don't like their neighbors, but I can deal with it if they weren't in my personal space. These kids play right in front of our door, every moment they are home, and NO ONE watches them!
For awhile, I just dealt with it, held it in, but now I'm getting crabby and snippy, and overly judgmental about everything because I am projecting how I feel onto everyone around me. (Sorry to Mike who takes most of it)
Now I'm starting to get sad. Just writing this I am getting teary... and why? Because I feel like a schmuck! I know of so many people that deal with so much more in their lives, many people have it harder than me, and here I am feeling sorry for myself, and then I feel bad and guilty for feeling this way and I cry. Its a terrible circle.
If its going to be another 2 years before we can move out of here, If I keep going on being unappreciated, If I have to listen to another story about something one of Keira's cousins did, If I have to be stuck inside for longer than a few days - I am going to have a nervous breakdown.
I just want a break!!!
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Our 1st Family Vacation
We went on our 1st ever family vacation last week to Gatlinburg, TN. Surprisingly, the drive wasn't too bad. Granted going there, not knowing what to expect, with the crazy steep winding roads, I was a bit terrified. And Mike was most likely very annoyed with my being terrified. But once we were there, it wasn't bad. It is amazing how quickly you get use to the roads. Granted I think it would take me a few visits there before I would be caught dead driving around there! We stopped over in Fairborn, OH Tuesday night, to have breakfast with Keira's great-grandparents. On our way to the hotel we passed by the Air Force base. I was in awe. I want to go back so bad now, to go to the museum and stare at the base and cool planes. It really was truly amazing, and that was just from passing by in the dark! In Gatlinburg, we went to the Ripley's Aquarium (rated the #1 aquarium and no joke, it was so awesome, I don't know if I could EVER step foot at the Shedd again, it really was that much better!). We also to the Guiness Museum of World Records and the Ripley's Believe it or not museum - It was really cool, but I feel like those are things you do once and never really have to do again, so I guess that's checked off the list. We really enjoyed walking around downtown Gatlinburg. "Mountain" people and their dogs are funny to watch. Good food there too - well at least the deep fried treats were! The cabin was amazing - I would love to live there... well except for the drive up to it and the bugs... I guess I'm saying that I really loved the openness and the way the sun made it happy :) I imagine on gloomy days it would really suck. It made me want a house. REAL BAD. Lots of good stuff happened, and it out weighed the bad stuff (aka my meltdown on Wednesday night: Apparently I shouldn't be messed with after being in a car for 6 hours and having not eaten, who knew?) I would definitely do it again, and I learned something about myself too - which learning is always good - I am apparently a push-over, and don't stand up for myself as much as I thought once that I did. Maybe I have taken the "is this the hill you want to die on?" approach too far. I also learned that when I have energy I get things done, but when they are un-done, I get very annoyed. I'm sure that Keira growing up and us having more children will tame that in me, but I really can't stand things being destroyed after they were just cleaned - especially by adults. I think that yesterday (monday) and today (tuesday) have actually been more relaxing than the entire vacation was. But at least now I know that "vacation" has many meanings to different people. And to me, its about relaxing, "sharing the load" of what responsibilities are unavoidable, doing some fun stuff, and eating good food. I am certainly happy to be home. I wonder if its too early to plan next year's vacation? LOL
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
1, 2, 3...
Monday, I decided it was time. Time to stop being lazy. Stop playing computer games and watching TV. It was time to start exercising. Since I haven't done an actual "work-out" since high school (HOLY COW - 8 years ago), I needed to start small. My theory is any movement will be an improvement. So I powered up our Wii, put in the Wii Fit disc, and then realized the wii remotes haven't been charged in a long time and the Wii Balance board's batteries were dead. I nearly said "oh well, this must be a sign... right?" but I didn't. I plugged in the wii remotes, and went on a mission to find batteries. Replaced them and grabbed a remote in hopes it could last for the mere 20 minutes I planned on doing anything. I erased my old character and started over. I got on there and got my starting weight. Which I really don't want to say out loud because its a huge number. But I will, I'll say it here. I'll say it because now only 3 days later I have hope that I can stick to it, and eat healthy-ish, and continue to lose weight.
Monday, I weighed 178lbs. I have weighed 178lbs since 3 months after having Keira. Granted when I was pregnant with her at the end I was just over 200lbs. But through the holidays, I managed to stay at the same weight... which is impressive to me, because I love the holiday food and fill myself to the gills!
So Tuesday, I got on that silly balance board and got my weight = 176lbs.
Wha? I lost 2 lbs in ONE day? Is that possible? Is that healthy? It can't be - It just can't be.
Today, I got on it again (yes 3 days in a row - and I plan to do it everyday at least Monday through Friday)... my weight = 173 lbs. SERIOUSLY?!
3 days and I've lost 5lbs.
Well then - lets keep our fingers crossed that this keeps up, because my goal is to be down to 150 lbs. I don't have a time-line. I would just like to be down to that at least at some point. And stay around that. I think technically for my height I shouldn't weigh over 120 lbs. But realistically? I'd be ridiculously tiny at 120 lbs. And its just an unrealistic goal, unless I completely change my diet - and I think that is nuts. Food makes me happy. Cooking it, Eating it, Sharing Recipes, Grocery Shopping - these things make me happy! So if I have to sacrifice a few pounds to make myself happy and not suffer through eating gross foods - I'll do it! Dropping Pepsi as it is, for me, is pretty impossible. Seems silly to make everyone around me suffer through my crabbiness, and make myself suffer. I still want to cut down to 1 a day - which I am close. I'm at about 1 and 1/2. I also need to make a conscious effort to drink more water, and maybe a glass of OJ a day. I'm officially drinking a big glass (12oz-ish) of milk a day... That's a big deal for me, I have NEVER been a milk drinker.
Time for lunch now - and I really have no idea what to make. Maybe tuna salad... or turkey salad... or turkey sandwich. Hmmmmm.... oh boy - and what to make for dinner tonight! Dilemmas!
Monday, I weighed 178lbs. I have weighed 178lbs since 3 months after having Keira. Granted when I was pregnant with her at the end I was just over 200lbs. But through the holidays, I managed to stay at the same weight... which is impressive to me, because I love the holiday food and fill myself to the gills!
So Tuesday, I got on that silly balance board and got my weight = 176lbs.
Wha? I lost 2 lbs in ONE day? Is that possible? Is that healthy? It can't be - It just can't be.
Today, I got on it again (yes 3 days in a row - and I plan to do it everyday at least Monday through Friday)... my weight = 173 lbs. SERIOUSLY?!
3 days and I've lost 5lbs.
Well then - lets keep our fingers crossed that this keeps up, because my goal is to be down to 150 lbs. I don't have a time-line. I would just like to be down to that at least at some point. And stay around that. I think technically for my height I shouldn't weigh over 120 lbs. But realistically? I'd be ridiculously tiny at 120 lbs. And its just an unrealistic goal, unless I completely change my diet - and I think that is nuts. Food makes me happy. Cooking it, Eating it, Sharing Recipes, Grocery Shopping - these things make me happy! So if I have to sacrifice a few pounds to make myself happy and not suffer through eating gross foods - I'll do it! Dropping Pepsi as it is, for me, is pretty impossible. Seems silly to make everyone around me suffer through my crabbiness, and make myself suffer. I still want to cut down to 1 a day - which I am close. I'm at about 1 and 1/2. I also need to make a conscious effort to drink more water, and maybe a glass of OJ a day. I'm officially drinking a big glass (12oz-ish) of milk a day... That's a big deal for me, I have NEVER been a milk drinker.
Time for lunch now - and I really have no idea what to make. Maybe tuna salad... or turkey salad... or turkey sandwich. Hmmmmm.... oh boy - and what to make for dinner tonight! Dilemmas!
Monday, February 22, 2010
Runny Noses, Sneezes and Coughs Oh My!
What a long night of listening to that poor lil girl cough all night. :(
So all day I'm chasing her around trying to wipe her drippy nose, and I left the tissue box within her reach - Whoops! I catch her emptying the box one tissue at a time. So I manage to take all the tissues away from her and the box and let her take one last tissue to keep. I put them back in the box and the box up high and when I turned around she put the tissue up to her nose and blew into it! Cutest darn thing I've seen in a while, well until a couple hours later when she started using the dining room table as a tunnel - that was darn cute too :D
So all day I'm chasing her around trying to wipe her drippy nose, and I left the tissue box within her reach - Whoops! I catch her emptying the box one tissue at a time. So I manage to take all the tissues away from her and the box and let her take one last tissue to keep. I put them back in the box and the box up high and when I turned around she put the tissue up to her nose and blew into it! Cutest darn thing I've seen in a while, well until a couple hours later when she started using the dining room table as a tunnel - that was darn cute too :D
Friday, February 19, 2010
1 year and a few days
This little girl is a lady of few words... "dada" and "daga" (aka doggie) is pretty much it. She makes a "da da" noise that kinda sorta sounds like "cra ca" (Cracker), and this morning once and ONLY once she said "wa wa" for water. She is silly and laughs at everything and thinks when you say "YAY" it means lets clap! As I type she is sorting out all her colored rings from the rest of her toys... I wonder if this is the first sign of her being an organizational freak like me... time will tell.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Day 368ish...
...but who's counting?
I wanted to start this over a year ago, but never got around to it.
So I figured, better late than never, right?
I will have to do a lot of back-tracking and whatnot but I hope to keep as much of my terrible memory right here to look back on all the little details.
Sunday, February 14th, 2010: My 'lil Keira turned 1 whole year old. It is so hard to imagine how life was before she came into our world.
Today we had her 12 month doctor appointment with her new doctor.
She is not as chunky as I had thought! She is a mere 22lbs 12 oz, 75th percentile! Her head circumference is a whole other story miss 93rd percentile! and she is 40th percentile for height. Of course I can't remember the actual #'s... maybe at her 15 month appointment I can ask so I can come back her and edit this out! That is, by the way, one thing I miss from her first doctor's office. They would send me on my way with the printout or her numbers and the graph showing where she is percentile-wise. Those who know me, know I like stuff like that. But I suppose everything takes getting adjusted to. I will adapt.
Lastly, I have a list of things I'd like to do in the next year or so.
1. Take Keira to a tots class of some sort
2. Join a mom's group. I think it is time to get Keira acquainted with new children besides her cousins.
3. Take a few Wilton's cake decorating classes.
4. Learn how to knit (take a class if need be)
5. Have someone teach me how to sew - maybe invest in a cheap sewing machine?
6. Get off the computer more so I can do all these hobbies I'd like to have!
7. Return to cooking from scratch more. I really enjoy cooking, its just really hard to do it with Keira crying at me feet - I swear she eats more crackers while I'm cooking just to keep her happy!
That's it - I think that is a doable list
11pm now g'night
I wanted to start this over a year ago, but never got around to it.
So I figured, better late than never, right?
I will have to do a lot of back-tracking and whatnot but I hope to keep as much of my terrible memory right here to look back on all the little details.
Sunday, February 14th, 2010: My 'lil Keira turned 1 whole year old. It is so hard to imagine how life was before she came into our world.
Today we had her 12 month doctor appointment with her new doctor.
She is not as chunky as I had thought! She is a mere 22lbs 12 oz, 75th percentile! Her head circumference is a whole other story miss 93rd percentile! and she is 40th percentile for height. Of course I can't remember the actual #'s... maybe at her 15 month appointment I can ask so I can come back her and edit this out! That is, by the way, one thing I miss from her first doctor's office. They would send me on my way with the printout or her numbers and the graph showing where she is percentile-wise. Those who know me, know I like stuff like that. But I suppose everything takes getting adjusted to. I will adapt.
Lastly, I have a list of things I'd like to do in the next year or so.
1. Take Keira to a tots class of some sort
2. Join a mom's group. I think it is time to get Keira acquainted with new children besides her cousins.
3. Take a few Wilton's cake decorating classes.
4. Learn how to knit (take a class if need be)
5. Have someone teach me how to sew - maybe invest in a cheap sewing machine?
6. Get off the computer more so I can do all these hobbies I'd like to have!
7. Return to cooking from scratch more. I really enjoy cooking, its just really hard to do it with Keira crying at me feet - I swear she eats more crackers while I'm cooking just to keep her happy!
That's it - I think that is a doable list
11pm now g'night
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